Sex during menopause: is it possible, features, problems || Sex during menopause

Many women believe that menopause and sex are incompatible things. When menopause occurs, the woman expects psychological and physical changes that affect the couple, especially their intimate life. Irritability, changeable mood, frequent hot flashes, insomnia, headaches, depression and other symptoms appear. Because of this, representatives of the fair sex believe that intimate life is now inaccessible to them, but is this so? In this article you will learn whether or not it is worth having sex after menopause, as well as how to have sex during menopause.

Menopause and intimate life - what is normal and what is not?

Menopause occurs in the life of every woman. These are not only changes in mood, hot flashes and much more. The main thing is that the woman stops menstruating, and she understands that her beauty is slowly beginning to fade. True, not everything is so bad. And with the onset of menopause, the owner of the fairer sex wants love and sex. But is sex possible during menopause? Many people believe that the concepts of “sex” and “menopause” are completely incomparable. But that's not true! Sex therapists believe that it is absolutely necessary to have sex after menopause! Let's try to figure this issue out together.

With the onset of 45-50 years, a woman begins to notice that some changes are occurring in her body. This also affects sex life. And therefore, many women are concerned about whether they have sex during menopause? Will it harm the body even more? You need to understand that all these changes are normal. You can cope with unwanted changes if you follow some tips. But more on that later.

What can be considered a “normal sex life”? There is no specific answer to this question. Since each person has a unique definition. The main thing is that you and your partner feel comfortable in bed. If you and your partner do not want intimacy, but you are comfortable spending time with each other talking, kissing and walking in the park, then this is normal. The problem arises when one partner has sexual desire and the other does not.

Is sex possible during menopause: changes in the body

A long absence of sex can negatively affect a person’s general condition. The fact is that during sex, oxytocin is produced, which can relieve general arousal and help reduce stress. It is thanks to this hormone that sleep after an intimate relationship is strong and long.

In the absence of sexual activity, this hormone is not produced, sleep becomes intense and short-lived, which affects the general condition. Poor sleep contributes to the development of depression and fatigue. Insomnia during menopause can be treated with medications. However, the resumption of active sexual life in this case is much more useful.

Lack of sex has a negative impact on your appearance. The skin becomes covered with acne and pimples, and inflammatory processes are possible. The fact is that lack of sex life reduces the overall immune system. Those who have sex regularly have a much stronger immune system and healthier skin.

Collagens are produced during sex. Collagen molecules behave much more actively during regular sex. They are very important for the formation of the skin framework and can completely replace all anti-aging products, drugs and procedures.

Age is not a barrier to intimate life. According to recently published statistics, about 70% of the male and 18% of the female population in the United States are sexually active. At the same time, the majority of women surveyed defined sex after menopause as satisfactory. In other words, you can have sex at any age and get the same pleasure from it.

The decrease in sexual desire in women occurs gradually and at the first stage depends on a decrease in the production of estrogens - the basic hormones of the fair sex. With a decrease in their concentration, caused by the extinction of the function of the ovaries (the main producing organ for such elements), the level of excitation becomes increasingly difficult to increase.

The average time of completed sexual intercourse increases significantly - it becomes much more difficult for representatives of the stronger sex to “ignite” and bring a woman to climax. The problem of decreased sexual desire is aggravated in the premenopausal stage by disruption of the menstrual cycle (it becomes almost impossible to calculate the dates of critical days in advance and use the “stop-start” technique during unprotected sexual intercourse).

Menopause is a physiological state of the female body. It occurs after 45 years (average age 47.5 years). It is characterized by inhibition of the functions of the ovaries, which produce the female hormone estrogen. This substance is responsible for a large number of processes, the main ones being:

• Maturation of the egg. This process requires a certain amount of estrogen. With its deficiency, the egg matures longer, the duration of the menstrual cycle increases (blood discharge may be absent for several months). In this regard, the risk of pregnancy is reduced, but this possibility remains, so protection should be used.
• Preservation of the female form. The female hormone can also be secreted by adipose tissue, so there is often a sharp weight gain of up to 5-8 kilograms or more, which is quite difficult to lose.
• Thinning of the mucous membranes, vaginal dryness, narrowing. In this case, sexual intercourse begins to cause discomfort, after which a burning sensation and pain are felt.
• The characteristic symptoms that most women experience are hot flashes, insomnia, and sleep disorders. As a result, they become irritable, their mood changes sharply, and tearfulness appears.

Many women deny themselves and their partners intimacy, believing that it is contraindicated for them.

Studies have shown that there is a direct relationship between having sex and the severity of menopausal syndrome. Many ladies deny themselves pleasure, noting a decrease in libido. But is it? Often, the problem lies in the following aspects:

• Psychological. Physiological changes and mood instability lead to a woman being dissatisfied with herself. She considers herself unattractive, unworthy of attention from a man. This especially happens against the background of weight gain.
• Physical. Hormonal changes provoke low secretion of natural lubrication, so instead of pleasure, she experiences discomfort.
• Social. The absence of a sexual partner and the husband's health problems make sex impossible. Also, upbringing plays an important role, which speaks of the unacceptability of sexual life in adulthood.

At the same time, it has been determined that regular sexual activity stimulates the production of genital lubrication and increases physical activity, which, in turn, accelerates metabolism. The production of certain hormones also occurs, which are also produced when consuming confectionery products and sweets.

Scientists have found that during menopause, many people want sex even more than before this period, especially since it is absolutely not harmful to the body. In this regard, the question arises about the permissible frequency of intimate life. There are certain statistics:

• Once a week allows you to make your partner happier. The body begins to produce happiness hormones. This mainly has a positive effect on self-esteem; the partner feels beautiful and attractive.
• 2 times a week helps strengthen the immune system. A special immunoglobulin is created on the mucous membranes, which prevents various pathogenic viruses, infections, and bacteria from entering.
• Sexual intercourse with a regular partner 3 times a week reduces the risk of developing myocardial infarction. This occurs due to vasodilation and increased blood flow.

During menopause, it is necessary to use contraceptives, as there is still a chance of pregnancy. Your doctor will help you choose the method.

If you don’t want sexual relations or they are impossible for some reason, this is reflected in your appearance and psychological state. The most common symptoms of this are:

• Insomnia appears, sleep is quite light. In the morning, the woman wakes up broken, feeling unwell, and not getting enough sleep.
• The appearance of inflammatory processes on the skin of the face. Reduced immunity causes the appearance of “teenage” problems: acne, pimples.
• Sharp aging of the skin, appearance of wrinkles. During sexual intercourse, collagen is produced - a substance responsible for skin elasticity.

There is practically no ban on intimacy on the part of doctors in adulthood. Therefore, it all depends on whether a woman wants sex after menopause. And psychological factors play the biggest role in this, because physical discomfort is much easier to eliminate.

Contacting a gynecologist, psychologist or psychotherapist, as well as a sexologist will help resolve any issues that may arise. A general series of recommendations on how to improve sex after menopause looks like this:

1. Hormone replacement therapy, in addition to reducing negative symptoms of menopause (such as hot flashes), will increase sex drive. Most experts recommend phytoestrogens because they are safer than chemical hormones, which increase the risk of breast cancer. Your doctor may also prescribe topical testosterone creams or phytoestrogens suppositories to promote natural lubrication and increase libido. You should take these medications only after consulting your doctor.
2. Physical activity. Physical therapy exercises will help restore the tone of the smooth muscles of the female genital organs. The Kegel exercise (alternate contraction and relaxation of intimate muscles) is very effective. Yoga is a godsend for a woman during menopause: there are special practices aimed at strengthening the pelvic floor muscles (which also protects against vaginal and uterine prolapse), revealing sexuality and increasing libido.
3. Proper nutrition during menopause, which will help maintain figure, tone and elasticity of the skin, condition of hair and nails, as well as vigor and well-being. All this is the key to beauty, which is important for a woman at any age: dissatisfaction with oneself has a detrimental effect on sexual desire.
4. The use of vitamins and minerals aimed at maintaining immunity, appearance and overall health;
5. Use of water-based lubricants. Silicone-based lubricants are highly undesirable because they destroy the latex from which condoms are made, and they are necessary for protection against sexually transmitted diseases. The risk of getting such an infection after menopause increases due to a decrease in the natural lubrication of the vagina. Condoms also provide better glide.
6. Get adequate sleep, at least 8, and preferably about 10 hours a day. It is important to go to bed and get up at the same time: observing biorhythms will ensure good health.
7. Visit a psychologist if you have sexual blocks. You may have to go to several sessions with your partner to regain your former understanding. Consulting a sexologist also has a beneficial effect on intimate relationships.
8. Creating an ambience and relaxing environment before sex. This could be a hot bath, candles and incense with aphrodisiacs, pleasant music, or a massage.
9. Maintaining your appearance by visiting beauty salons and spa centers. Shopping with friends, the result of which will be new underwear, a beautiful dress, as well as hair and makeup, will return the former self-confidence to any woman. After all, adulthood is the ideal time to enjoy yourself.

Decreased libido

Some women do not notice this change. For some, it multiplies several times. And this is due to the fact that a woman goes in for sports. This could be Pilates, fitness, aerobics, yoga and much more. But most of the fair sex complain of decreased libido. They don't experience the same level of desire for sex during menopause. This may be due to:

• The amount of estrogen in the blood. Gradually, its level decreases and this provokes hot flashes. The woman begins to sweat, especially at night. Your mood may change several times a day and this negatively affects your sex life.
• Feeling unattractive. A woman’s hormonal background changes and because of this she may be overweight, have abundant hair growth on her face and body, or, conversely, have excessive hair loss. Problems also arise with the skin.
• Medical problems. For example, urinary incontinence, uterine prolapse or prolapse. The woman feels shame and therefore refuses intimacy.

How to solve this problem?

There is no way in the world that would instantly solve this problem. But this doesn't mean you don't have a chance to regain your sex drive. First of all, find the attractive sides in yourself, remember what compliments you received from members of the opposite sex. Perhaps you have a beautiful smile, a captivating look, or a pleasant voice.

For medical concerns, consult your doctor. It will help you cope with this discomfort and you will not have to feel ashamed during sex. This also applies to hot flashes, sweating, and depression. Have you gained a little weight? It's OK. Just adjust your diet correctly. Stop eating fatty foods.

Sign up for a dance class. Start doing yoga, fitness or any other sport. This will give you confidence and you will start to feel attractive. There are also special exercises that keep the pelvic muscles toned.

When you need extra help

Lack of sex during menopause is a problem that can be solved. In most cases, it is enough for a woman to break her own psychological barriers and continue to live a full life. Special moisturizers may be required from auxiliary products and medications.

Unfortunately, not all older women are able to cross the line of old age and rediscover their sexual desires. In this case, you need to contact a specialist who will prescribe effective treatment and recommend preventive measures. There are several main methods of treatment and prevention1,4;

• Menopausal hormone therapy or MHT. This method is the most effective and is used mainly for menopausal syndrome, when the symptoms of menopause are too pronounced. MHT helps minimize the impact of menopause on a woman’s life. The essence of therapy is to replenish the hormones lost by the body. Increasing libido is precisely a consequence of therapy, and not the main goal. Therapy must begin at a certain stage and strictly follow all doctor’s recommendations. Ointment tablets, gels, and patches are used as medications.
• Local treatment. This method is aimed directly at maintaining vaginal moisture. Ointments and creams are used, which also contain the necessary hormones.
• Physical exercises and gymnastics. Maintaining the physical tone of the vagina is extremely important. Today, strengthening the pelvic floor muscles is included in the category of fitness, and exercises are not limited to the famous Kegel gymnastics.
• Psychotherapy. Problems with sex can cause trust problems in the family, which in turn further provoke reluctance to have sex. The effect of a vicious circle is created, which only a competent psychotherapist can break.

As alternative methods, many women try herbal medicine and all kinds of physical exercises. Improving your standard of living, physical activity, walking in the fresh air and interesting general pastimes play a key role in the prevention of sexual relations.

Also, during sex during menopause, you need to remember the need to use lubricants, which will not only help cope with vaginal dryness, but will also give new sensations, and at the same time the desire for further sexual intercourse. Sex during menopause and after menopause is possible, necessary and useful.

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Pain and discomfort during intercourse

If a woman leads a passive lifestyle, then the elasticity of her uterus and vagina also changes, which can bring discomfort during sexual intercourse. There may also be vaginal dryness, itching or burning. Do not despair. You don’t have to give up receiving pleasure in advance, just prepare yourself and your body more carefully.

How to solve this problem?

Want to overcome vaginal dryness and discomfort? Stop using chemical products on your intimate area. What is meant. Wash with clean water, without soap, as it dries. If necessary, use hypoallergenic soap specifically for the intimate area. Toilet paper should only be white. Wash your underwear with hypoallergenic powder and rinse well after washing.

Have sex during menopause regularly. Even several months without sex, the vagina becomes thin and dry. Gradually it atrophies. This is why a woman begins to experience discomfort during intimacy. Buy a vaginal dilator. They are sold in sets. They are used to gradually accustom your body to react normally to sexual intercourse. At any pharmacy or sex shop, buy artificial lubricant or, as it is also called, lubricant. If nothing helps, then consult a gynecologist.

How a woman feels during menopause: myths and reality

Despite hormone replacement therapy, which most women resort to, the physiological process of menopause negatively affects some vaginal functions. Natural lubrication almost completely disappears, the uterus contracts weakly, soft tissues and mucous membranes lose their elasticity.

This problem can be solved in several ways:

1. Adjustment of hormonal therapy under the supervision of a specialized specialist;
2. Using artificial lubricants for sexual intercourse;
3. Timely treatment of any diseases of the genitourinary system, as well as their prevention.

Lack of orgasm

Many women after menopause complain about the difficulty of achieving orgasm, or its complete absence. Representatives of the fair sex have a sexual desire, a psycho-emotional mood too, but they cannot achieve the climax of sexual intercourse.

The root cause is insufficient stimulation of the nerve endings of the walls of the vagina and clitoris due to contractile weakness of the uterus and a decrease in the elasticity of the soft tissues of the latter. However, the skillful actions of a partner, regular exercise therapy to strengthen the tone of the muscles of the genital organs, the creation of the necessary relaxation atmosphere and the right attitude can help a woman reach the peak of pleasure.

The main recommendations of modern medical specialists include the following points:

1. Hormone replacement therapy. Simultaneous administration of estrogen and progesterone is prescribed. Prohibited in case of increased risks of breast cancer and other systems in the fair sex;
2. Taking prescribed symptomatic medications to eliminate the unpleasant manifestations of menopause. These can be painkillers (for migraines), antidepressants (for stress and depression), sleeping pills (for sleep disorders), etc.;
3. The use of vitamin and mineral complexes for additional support of the body;
4. Therapeutic exercise aimed at improving the tone of the smooth muscles of the genital organs, as well as preventing possible problems with the musculoskeletal system;
5. If necessary, physiotherapy as prescribed. UHF, UV, electrophoresis and other activities;
6. Normalization of circadian rhythms. To maintain sexual activity, a woman during menopause is recommended to sleep at least 8 hours a day, go to bed and get up at the same time, and periodically rest while awake;
7. Correction of the power plan. Nutritionists prescribe a rational diet with a decrease in the consumption of simple carbohydrates, trans fats, heavily fried and smoked foods, marinades, as well as the introduction of more healthy vegetables, fruits, and herbs. It is undesirable to eat food before going to bed or having sex; the nutritional plan is fractional, with a calorie limit of up to 2.5 thousand units;
8. Psychotherapy sessions, if necessary, allowing you to avoid depression, relax and tune in to the right mood;
9. Cardio loads. In addition to exercise therapy, it is advisable for a woman to engage in cardio training of low or moderate intensity;
10. Home relaxation. Walks in the fresh air, warm baths, massages and other activities;
11. Preparing for intimacy. Creating an optimal atmosphere for future sex, aromatherapy, pre-prepared lubricants, and, if necessary, the use of natural stimulants;
12. Rejection of bad habits. During menopause - avoid alcohol, tobacco and drugs in any form.

Three stages of the process can be distinguished:

• Premenopause is the period from the appearance of the first symptoms of menopause to the complete cessation of menstruation. Depending on the individual characteristics of the body and health status, the duration of premenopause can be from one year to ten years. During this period, the symptoms of menopause either fade away or begin with renewed vigor. Most often the process takes about three to four years.
• Menopause is the absence of menstruation for a certain amount of time. True menopause is considered if after the last menstruation there have been no more menstruation periods for a year. Some experts believe it is more correct to calculate menopause after two years.
• Postmenopause takes two to four years. At this stage, the ovaries completely stop producing sex hormones. This fact is reflected in the size of the genital organs (uterus, vagina, breasts, labia decrease by one and a half to two times) and the sex life of a woman during menopause. It is during the postmenopausal period that complete indifference to sex most often appears.

Modern gynecologists are of the opinion that sex after menopause has a positive effect on a woman’s overall well-being. During sexual intercourse, blood flows to the pelvic organs, which has a positive effect on their functioning. This significantly reduces congestion, which often provokes the development of inflammatory and infectious processes in the reproductive system. In general, a woman who periodically has sex after menopause faces fewer problems from the psychological aspect and self-esteem.

Doctors give a positive answer to this question. It has been established that sex after menopause in women maintains the vaginal muscles in the necessary tone. This fact has a positive effect on the condition of the reproductive system. For example, a disorder such as uterine prolapse is much less common in these women. In addition, periodic sexual intercourse promotes the production of lubrication in a larger volume, which reduces pain during intercourse.

Some women experience a craving for sex after menopause. Ovulatory processes, during which sexual desire increases, are not observed during menopause, but ladies periodically need intimate relationships. Answering the question about whether you want sex after menopause, gynecologists note that such a phenomenon can occur.

This type of sexual intercourse is the choice of the married couple themselves. This sex often occurs during menopause. This is due to the woman’s fear of pregnancy. During this period, single ovulations may occur. This type of sexual contact reduces the risk of its occurrence.

In women who have reached menopause, sexual intercourse has its own characteristics. Many ladies complain of pain during contact. This fact is associated with vaginal dryness. Due to a decrease in the concentration of estrogen in the bloodstream, the amount of lubricant released decreases. It is produced by glands that are located in the vestibule of the vagina. In addition, pain may be associated with:

• decreased tissue elasticity;
• thinning of the vaginal walls.

The possibility of pain due to reasons not related to age-related changes in the genitals should not be excluded. These include:

1. Vaginitis. Inflammatory processes are noted as a consequence of a decrease in local immunity, which is caused by changes in the functioning of the hormonal system. With this disorder, the following are observed: burning, itching, swelling of the vaginal tissue, pain during urination. Treatment is prescribed by a gynecologist based on the research results obtained.
2. Vaginismus. A condition characterized by involuntary, short contractions of the pelvic floor and vaginal muscles. As a result, during sexual intercourse the partner experiences difficulty in inserting the penis, which causes pain in the lady. To solve the problem, you must seek medical help.

A problem such as menopause affects both sexes, while physically women are less susceptible to its influence. However, it is the fair sex who tend to refuse intimacy. The roots of the problem, as always, must be sought in human physiology and psychology.

During menopause, the female body is subject to the following changes: female sex hormones decrease, which in turn leads to a slowdown in blood circulation and deterioration of blood circulation in the pelvic area. Due to decreased exposure to estrogen, there is a slowdown in cell recovery in this area.

However, as in most cases, the main problems come from the head. You can and should have sex. Perhaps now a woman should be more careful about sexual intercourse and use various ointments and medications. But the main thing is to overcome psychological problems.

Unlike men, in most cases the key component of intimacy for a woman is psychology. A decrease in hormonal levels during menopause also contributes to a decrease in the overall emotional background, which can lead to serious consequences.

On the one hand, menopause relieves women of many inconveniences. On the other hand, the changes that the female body undergoes during this period can cause a feeling of inferiority. Many people consider themselves unattractive and unable to interest the opposite sex. However, this is not the case at all.

The psychological aspect may seem insignificant only at first glance. In fact, dealing with your own insecurities and returning to a healthy life can be very difficult. In some cases, the help of a qualified psychologist is necessary, although for the most part, women can cope with this problem on their own.

Lack of orgasm

The most important thing is to enjoy sex. But with the onset of menopause, it becomes increasingly difficult to enjoy your intimate life. This is due to hormonal changes, decreased sensitivity of the clitoris, and depression.

Solution

Diversify your sex life. Go to a sex shop, try something new. There you will definitely find the thing that will help you. For example, a vibrator. It will increase blood flow to the intimate area. Be sure to talk to your partner. Tell him that you didn't have an orgasm today. This can happen in any couple. And this is not specific to you or your partner. And together you will find a solution.

Reasons for the development of menopause

Is it possible to delay menopause and for what reasons does it develop? For most women, the starting point for the onset of menopause is taken to be around forty-five years of age. Most often it coincides with the appearance of the first clinical manifestations of menopause.

As a rule, by the time a woman reaches the age of fifty, menstrual function finally ends, and the menopause clinic becomes brighter.

Medicine knows cases of early menopause. This is the cessation of menstruation before the age of forty.

The reasons for this phenomenon include:

• Shereshevsky-Turner syndrome;
• severe nervous shock;
• hereditary factor;
• some endocrine diseases;
• anorexia;
• chemotherapy;
• gynecological diseases of an infectious nature;
• disruption of ovarian function under the influence of the X chromosome.

These same reasons often become decisive for the onset of menopause at the age of forty-five to fifty years. Many women want to delay the onset of menopause and for this purpose begin to take hormone replacement therapy drugs. In some cases, this helps delay the onset of menopause for about ten to fifteen years and allows you to continue enjoying the pleasures of sexual activity.

How to enjoy sex and more

Here are some tips so you don't have to give up your sex life. On the contrary, by following them, you will be able to receive even more pleasure and enjoyment.

1. Have sex regularly. Do not stop sexual intercourse with the onset of menopause. Thus, you will keep your vagina in good shape.
2. When you begin to notice changes in your cycle, immediately contact a gynecologist-endocrinologist who will advise you on a course of birth control pills. The hormones contained in these drugs will help you prolong your reproductive age and have a beneficial effect on youth. During sexual intercourse, use various lubricants to moisten the vagina.
3. Start playing sports, even if you have never done it before. If you are embarrassed to go to the gym, then there are many video tutorials or books with exercises that you can do at home.
4. Start eating right. Try eating less meat in your daily diet and switching to light foods containing phytoestrogens.

Have sex regularly. Menopause is not a death sentence. All problems that occur in the body can be dealt with. If you have psychological problems and you cannot cope with them on your own, contact a psychologist.

Do not be afraid! Sex and menopause are compatible! Learn to accept yourself, enjoy life every day. Don't focus on this period as if it were a problem! Even during this period you can have an active sex life. You can have sex during menopause! Enjoy life, and don’t let menopause be a hindrance for you!

The psychological aspect of sex during menopause

Having sex for a woman at any age is closely intertwined with a psychological aspect.
This is a rather multi-component issue, so it is very difficult to consider it within the framework of one material. But general points can be outlined today. For example, what is a woman’s sexuality, what does it consist of? It turns out that for this it is extremely important to feel confident, attractive and sexy. To put it simply, this characteristic is born in a woman’s head, it is something among magnetism. If a woman is confident in herself, then she broadcasts her confidence to her environment, thereby giving reason to consider her personality attractive and sexy.

What happens with age? A representative of the fair sex sees that her body is gradually changing shape and outline. This does not mean at all that it is getting worse. Only noticeable fat on her stomach or skin that has lost some elasticity - all this can significantly reduce her desire to have sex. A woman simply stops feeling sexy and attractive.

Therefore, it is so important to maintain this internal feeling in yourself, not to lose the woman inside you, and to continue to monitor your appearance. Let your wardrobe be filled with beautiful and sophisticated things. They don't have to be expensive. But still, at this age you can already afford a couple of luxury things.